Yea Uncle Dan!

So this past weekend we went to Virginia Tech to watch my brother-in-law graduate! We are SO proud of him and Kinsley was his own personal little cheerleader!
I can't even begin to tell you how much attention she got at the stadium for this little outfit!

Uncle Dan is in there somewhere! YEA!
Sadly we missed his College Graduation (this was the University) because Kinsley got randomly sick and had to visit the ER in Roanoke, VA! She's fine but more on that later!

5 months!

Dear Cupcake,

You are now FIVE months old! I can't believe it. I don't know where the time has gone. You're now laughing and talking CONSTANTLY. We don't know what you're saying but you LOVE saying it! You're discovering new things every day, like rolling over! You can roll from your tummy to your back and from your back to your tummy! The first time Daddy and I saw you do it we didn't even see it. We looked down and you were on your back and then looked back again and you were on your tummy! It was so funny! Everyone thought we were silly for getting so excited!

Each morning I get the pleasure of getting you up and ready for the day! You always great me with a smile. Whether it's from your crib where i walk in to find you playing with and talking to your feet, or from right beside me in bed where i brought you when you woke up at 4 in the morning (only 30 minutes before i have to get up) hungry.

Right now your favorites are your feet (you LOVE eating them), Sesame Street (you watch it on car trips with Mommy and Daddy aren't entertaining enough for you anymore), your Sophie teether, standing (assisted), and baths! You love attention and start smiling as soon as you see a camera is pointed at you!

You've taken Daddy and my heart! Just thinking about you brings a smile to our faces and i couldn't imagine a more perfect baby! Mommy loves you baby girl, i just wish you would stop growing up so fast! I want to keep you my little peanut forever.

Later this month we're going to have you dedicated at church. You're whole family is going to be there! This means Daddy and I are going to do our best to make sure you know God and how much he loves you. So if you're ever sad, confused, lonely, or scared just lean on him baby girl. Look to him for guidance and be the best little girl you can be and everything will always be fine!

Love you more then i thought possible!
Mommy

Right now Kinsley ALWAYS has a finger in her mouth chewing away!
It's so easy to get her to smile... this is literally ten minutes after she woke up!
Oh just look at the yummy rolls coming! I love to squeeze and kiss them!

I'm in love

To say i love shoes is an understatement! Shoe are the part of a wardrobe that always makes me smile! They are the part that ALWAYS fits (unless you're eight months pregnant but that's neither here nor there)! You can have fat days and still get to wear your favorite heels!

Now i stumbled across the guess website and my heart started beating faster and my palms started sweating and i got this crazy little content smile on my face. I immediately started trying to think of ways to justify needing to spend a few hundred dollars on these shoes, but other then giving me sweet unnatural bliss every time i put them on my feet, i couldn't think of a one.

So instead of buying them, i'm going to share my favorites with you!

Check out this pair... every girl needs a nude pair of shoes. Makes your legs look longer and matches everything. AND i just think this pair happens to be perfect! (Hey i don't have a pair of nude heels, is that a justification??)
I love the girlishness of eyelet and now they are on SHOES! This is too good to be true!
OKay tell me these aren't HOT! In jeans, with a skirt, or MY favorite, with a pair of rolled up boyfriend jeans! OMG my heart is melting!
These are sure to stop you man in his tracks! Lepored, RED, Heel! SQUEE!!!
Platform, buckle, SNAKE! I might have just hugged myself in happiness!
OMG, i HAVE to find a justification for these! They are the reason for my exsistence! I was meant to wear these! PINK SPARKLY HEELS! If i die before i can buy these, BUY THEM and bury me in them! Seriously, treat this as my Last will and testament and DO IT... oh and buy a second pair for Kinsley so she can always remember me and the happiness i found in these shoes! (Morbid thought i know but LOOK AT THOSE SHOES!). I really think these shoes sum up my definition as a person. Fun, Pink, sophisticated practical pump, while a fun sparkly impractical pink! OMG! OKAY moving on...
Bow Chicka WOW WOW! Yea! THESE little babies are just DYING to get in my feet with a nice black pencil skirt!
And for the ever pratical woman... black... BUT with a BOW! I puffy heart bows!

okay can we just one more time....
ahhhh... much better!

Sad

So this video below is SERIOUSLY disturbing! I can't stand how terrible it is. I wouldn't have posted it but i wanted you to have a base for where my frustrations are coming from... it's hard to put into words how I feel but Blair does it QUITE well!

And now Chris has decided we will NOT have a "Tiny Dancer" in our house if this is what they will be teaching her!

It's time I look to Me

So yesterday I put it out there, and you know... i'm going to keep it out there. As long as it's out then i don't feel like i'm drowning in this alone. So here's where i'm going with all of this...I've been emailing with an old friend lately and she's been going through a funk too, and she's decided to start putting herself first so that she CAN be a better mother, wife, etc. and it's funny that she decided that b/c I sort of did too without putting the phrase to it. I'm Trying to figure out what makes me tick, why i procrastinate, why i become so easily defeated. I know i deal with depression and it's being treated, but i think next time i meet with my psychiatrist we need need to treat it as more then a chemical imbalance and work more on me.

I ordered some books to help me Organize my life and to look deeper in myself (I'll let you know how they are and if they are good i'll pimp them out on here)

I decided I'm tired of dieting (Even though weight watchers SAYS it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle change, IT'S A DIET to EVERYONE i've spoken to about it). I want to eat for my fuel, not for my happiness. I want my food to give me energy, not comfort. I want to have REAL food, not sodium packed frozen boxed meals ALL THE TIME!

I just want to find a way to be happy without a justification of "I will be happy when...". Don't get me wrong, my daughter, husband, family, and friends all make me VERY happy, i love them dearly and couldn't be luckier... but there's still that funk always weighing me down. And i have to look at me for that. I didn't realize yesterday that when i was ordering those books that would be my ultimate goal but i think until i'm passionate (my friends phrase) about me and taking care of me, everything else is just going to sub par.

I'm excited and overwhelmed with this new journey that I'm going to be going on but I think it's going to be a great ride (if I follow through with it!) lol.

So what are you passionate about? How do you not loose sight of who you are? How do you "Keep it real"?

The Bow Gods Have Smiled on us!

So we ALL know i have a slight problem with buying bows. They are like my crack, and let me tell you Momma has got QUITE the crack habit! Kinsley just had some new bows come in the mail and let me tell you they are SOOO FREAKING CUTE!

Here's some of her booty!

I just LOVE the Fish!
She got a different Jewel then the one shown but still VERY VERY cute!


AND she got a custom bow for her Dedication AND she was gifted a bracelet to match! Where did she get all of this fabulousness? Our favorite bow maker Princess Couture Designs! She put them all on baby snap clips for us (so they stay amazingly in Kinsley's baby-fine hair) and now she's going to be the hit of Virginia Tech when we go there tomorrow to see her Uncle graduate! YEA!

What Makes it all worth it!

She's an angel!

She's my mini-me
She cheers me on when i think i can't keep going on!