Whoa, I'm late today! So our guest blogger today is Modern Mom from How to Survive Life in the Suburbs. I fell in love with reading all about the antics that she deals with that i just KNEW she had to be a guest blogger! She has a great sense of humor and always has a funny story to share. This self proclaimed Modern Mom is a mother, a wife, a good friend, and a person still trying to find peace and enjoy every day. She gave up her beloved career to stay home with her amazing children. She's an inspiration to read about, plus she makes it so much fun!
So without further ado:
Mommy Cliques In Suburbia
School is back in full swing and all the Mommies, they are back! They are putting on their suburban Mom outfits and venturing out of their cars for after school pickups. It's time to say Hello to everyone, and get caught up on those we have lost touch with over the short hot summer. As I float from group to group of Mommies I have a revelation. I am smack in the middle of a jungle of cliques. The Mommies, they have divided!
Some of the way way post high school cliques I noticed this fine fall day:
Granola Bar Mommies
-health food eating, only organic, save the earth, never use a plastic bag, gave up my car and bike freakin everywhere!
Fashionista Mommies
-can only shop "Down Town", are perfectly made up, never chip a nail and wear ONLY designer clothes
Sporty Mommies
-teach their own aerobic classes, wear cute yoga pants and hoodies everywhere, have their own walking clubs and have a date set for their next marathon
The Super Gossips
-self explanatory. Super dangerous. Consider yourself warned.
The Too Familiar with Other Moms Husbands Mommies
-sadly this group is growing. Gross. If he is married, Keep. Your. Hands. Off.
The Slutty Moms
-closely related to the above group.
-wears shorty shorts, enjoys skin tight jeans and low cut bar shirts every day, thinks she is still 19, may have just had some "Summer Surgery". I certainly don't remember those stripper boobs being there last spring. Neither does my Hubby. Ha
The Never Gets Out of Her Car Mommies
-seriously-who are you? Mysterious dark sunglasses, tinted windows, drops off, picks up, no one has ever seen you, you never volunteer for a thing? We don't bite!
The Uber Volunteer Mommies
-have their hands in everything, the ultimate kiss a**, driving the teachers nuts, always at the school Moms.
The I'm Better Then You Mommies
-nose turned up, opinionated but not helpful, pushy, often leads to play dates from hell, always has a job more important then you.
-as a bonus, clearly has a child smarter, prettier, more talented then yours.
The Live Only For My Kids Mommies
-live and die by the kids schedule, come and sit in the car and watch the kids at recess to make sure they are Okay, take them home for every lunch, never do anything for themselves!
(Okay so that is just one Mommy I know of, but thought she deserved a mention!)
The Executive Mommies
-the lawyers, doctors, V.P.'s, head researchers ...the suits
The Give You the Shirt Off their Backs Mommies
-these women would give you anything you need, help you any way they can, stuck for a sitter? sick kid? need a car pool? an ear? lovable, squishy, big hearted Mommies
This list just begins to scratch the surface of the Mommy cliques. There are probably as many different cliques as there are people.
What I have learned. If you are going to survive life in the Suburbs, you have to accept that there are some super scary Mama's out there. Avoid them! The good news, it turns out the suburbs are also full of some of the most sincere caring and loving women on the planet. Women just like you. Struggling to get through this life, and enjoy a little laughter along the way.
Did you like what you read, go and check her out on her blog and Twitter!
Awe Thanks for the kind words and for having me as your Guest Blogger this week!
ReplyDeleteHope you have a fabulous weekend.