Bring it on

No I'm not going to start doing a back flip in a little skirt while some gay, or not so gay, guy holds me up in the air by my ass. I'm bringing on my eating... my clean eating. I feel off the wagon a little last night with some baked beans. I didn't realized baked beans weren't paleo... I figured the sauce wasn't but the bean... uh... but I didn't eat the mashed potatoes OR the mac and cheese AND I didn't have wine! Score for me!

I feel like this time, more than any other time, I get it. I really GET how this journey is mine and it all comes down to ME and MY choices. Yes I wanted to get a big chips and cheese dip snack after the kids went to bed, but you know what, I settled for an apple. Was I happy about it? HELL NO! But I was happy that I could control that craving and make the better choice for myself.

I haven't started working out again, it's been really crazy. Probably won't start tonight either, but I can't do EVERYTHING... I just can't. I can chose to put the right things in my pie hole.

Tonight I've set it up for success... at least with myself. I made beef stew in the crockpot! The kids may tell me they are full and don't like it, but at least I know I'll be eating something besides the 3/4 of the can of peas I ate last night!

Low point though this morning... I was sumo squatting my daughter from her bed to the floor so i could get her dressed and my pants ripped. It was the lining of my very nice wool work pants, but still, it happened. Loudly. I.was.devastated.

Enter in motivation to keep making the right choices. It may not be fast, but it will happen.

Let it begin, again

I'm beginning my clean eating, paleo lifestyle again. I'm not saying no carbs, etc ever again. And i'm not saying to wine ever again. I'm saying not for now. I'm going to commit myself to this for 30 days. See there's 97 until my brother-in-law's wedding (yes Jess you read that right, even though I know you already know that). He's marrying my long lost sister and I can't wait! So in hopes of not hating my photos from that day (the whole family is in the wedding so we're bound to get some good ones!), i'm getting my diet in check!

It's time to put on my big girl pants and just recognize that I'm failing myself. I am not 18 anymore and I cannot eat an entire tray of fries and not gain weight. Plus I should be doing that anyway. I need to take care of my body by putting good things into it and being a good example to my kids with the food I eat. So hello meat and green beans!