Tuesday, January 4, 2022

Nothing works

I am still always tired 😭😭. I take the extended release Adderall and it’s only 10:45 am and I’m ready to collapse into sleep. It’s such a strong pull my forehead feels heavy. I’m really over this. I don’t want to do that crazy strong drug, even though all the narcolepsy forums sing it’s praises. I just don’t feel comfortable on it especially with children I’m responsible for. 

Every time I speak to my Dr I feel like she’s thinking, uh here we go again. But if something isn’t working then why keep using it? She is super nice and helpful, I just feel like a failure every time I go back to her with a “nope still not working”. 

Here I am just waiting for lunch time to come so I can take a break. I know some think a lunchtime nap sounds amazing but when you feel like you NEED it every day, sometimes multiple times a day it’s not fun! You feel bad about yourself. You feel lazy and helpless. You feel like a quitter and I am NOT a quitter. 

Uh pray this gets resolved soon. 

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Sunday, January 2, 2022

Who knows if it’s working… it’s break

Last day of Christmas break. My sleep schedule is so screwed up right now you would never know if the meds are actually working. It’s healthy for everyone to have a sleep routine/schedule. Your body learns what it needs to do and when. The bedtime routine prepares your body that sleep is coming. We sleep train babies, why not us? 

So especially with New Year’s Eve and staying up late I’m all kinds of messed up. So is the Adderall working? No idea. Still needed a nap but I’m not surprised. Today (Jan 2nd) I could not pull myself out of bed before 10 and I honestly could only barely do it, but did it because I knew my husband was downstairs waiting for me to wake up. Buuuttt we also went to bed around 1AM (thanks Yellowstone binge watching). 

So I’ll let ya know later this week. For now I’m fighting the sleep fog. Zzzzzzz

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