Monday, December 28, 2009

The power of the backwards C

The power of the backwards C is the key to helping your baby poop/fart. One day Chris and i were watching a show called Doctors and they came on with a great tip. If your baby seems gassy and can't seem to make things move along rub their stomach in a backwards C. This is the way the intestines flow and you'll help them flow.

So since my child is VERY gassy and it keeps her from taking any decent naps during the day i try the power of the C.... sadly this doesn't help her to nap longer but man the stuff it helps her push out!

Kinsley also enjoys the power of the C... it often calms her since it help rids her of her projectile poop!

So if your baby seems to be gassy and fussy... try the power of the C, it may not help her to take a better/longer nap... BUT it will help her pitiful little tummy.

You're not a parent until poop is involved...

Well you all know how Kinsley likes to try to surprise us with her pee... well she's figured it out with her poop hole too...

Breastfed poop is very liquidy... not sure about formula but man with this boob fed child when she poops you know because you hear it for miles! Tonight we thought she might have blown her butt cheeks apart it was so powerful... it's projectile poop that gets caught by the all mighty pampers!

Well when you think she's done and you wait and wait and wait... well Kinsley is waiting too... waiting to take aim. The other morning i was changing her diaper in bed when she started pooping again and i caught it before it made a big mess... i had to get ANOTHER diaper but that's cool... so i arm myself with her now second new diaper and right as i'm pulling and switching WAM! she projectile poops ALL OVER my abdomen. I mean I think i saw her try to lift her butt to try to aim higher! So here i am covered in poop while my dear darlin husband is snoring soundly next to me... until i woke him with my shocked screams!

So now i'm officially a parent... christened by the poop!

Merry Christmas K!

Kinsley had a great Christmas... full of family and gifts! Here's a few photos to see how her day went.

She started her Christmas Eve with her first bottle. She loved it and had no problem going back to the boob.... lately it seems the only time she isn't fussy is when she's on the boob... yet she falls asleep on it (no matter how hard i try to keep her awake) and then wakes up when i try to do something and is fussy... but i can't feed her again for 2 hours from when she started feeding the first time so it's a count down until she's not fussy again... we think she's gassy, so we use gas drops... she's still fussy though... oh well... on to the photos.

Here's a few of her funny faces in her Christmas PJ's.

She loves the playmat that Santa brought her!

Thursday, December 24, 2009

She's a true Diva!

So i always joked that Kinsley was a Diva when she was inside me... well i don't think that's changed. She's been a bit fussy lately (normally that only happens at night) and so today when she was fussy i took her upstairs. I changed her clothes and then fed her. Well after i fed her she started pooping... i was VERY excited about this (yes you will get very excited about poop when you become a parent! you will pray for poop and celebrate poop).... so when she started pooping and kept going i was cheering her on (thinking this would help her feel better)... well it did... it felt good to her all the way up her back. Yep that's right, our frist blow out... i mean it practically went up to her neck! And right after i put new clothes on her! lol... oh well... so we threw her in the tub, washed her down, put another set of clothes on her and then i fed her AGAIN to calm and sooth her... then my little Diva was content... or at least i think so... see for yourself.

Monday, December 21, 2009


So we did it... we saw Santa! Well Kinsley didn't SEE him but she was held by him! More on that later when i can use both hands to type... but here's the cutie!

Saturday, December 19, 2009

Pacifier from the Gods!

So one of my good friends from church gave me a pacifier for a baby gift (among other things) but let me tell you... i don't recall off the top of my head what those other things were, i just remember she gave me THIS pacifier. When we got home from the hospital i started trying paci after paci and Kinsley (my little Deva) rejected them all... finally i took THIS paci out of the wrapper and stuck it in and WHA LA! She was sold and so was I! This pacifier is given in VERY FEW hospitals so it must be ordered online... i tried to buy some "soothie look alikes" and she KNEW right away this was not HER Deva paci... so i am now ordering more in fear that we will loose our one. What is this little piece of magical silicone? It's the Gumdrop Pacifier!To get yours just go to They are cheap and WORTH IT!


First i want to thank everyone for the comments and tips! It's VERY much appreciated! We actually, randomly, had some success last night... she slept in her bassinet from 9ish until 12ish, woke up and ate, then slept in it again from then until 3ish... thene woke up and ate... and then she was done sleeping in it... but that was like 6 hours of sleeping on her own!!! WOW!!!! I was pretty excited!

Well it seems that my little bit is a snow baby! It snowed the day after she was born and it is coming down again... we have over a foot of snow right now and it's going to keep coming all day! So i think K brought the snow in with her! We are even predicted to get more later in the week so we'll have a white Christmas! YEA! But don't worry... i wouldn't tell you all about this without showing you some pictures of my snow bunny!

Oh and don't worry, we're not bad parents, she was out there for 1 minute tops... snap and photo and back into grandma's warm arms inside!

I know you're LOVING the camo pants i had to borrow fromm Chris, i don't have any snow pants... oh well.

So here's an update on K's two week appointment. She now weights 8lbs and 7oz! What a cute little chunker! And she's 21 and a quarter inches now! She sure is growing!

Here she is throwing some gang signs!

Here's a few of the sleeping angel

I am doing well too.. i'm pretty much healed and getting around just fine... the boobs on the other hand are still a work in progress but you can't win the all and i'm still sticking it out since Kinsley is growing so well! I've also lost 25lbs, only 10 left to get to my starting weight. I've joined weight watchers online to help with that (haven't officially started it yet but i plan on it very soon!) and my brother gave us a Wii for Christmas so i'm going to get the Wii Fit to help with toning, etc once i can workout again!

Well hope all of ya'll are doing well, i'm going to get back to my kissy face baby... here's one of her funny kissy faces she makes.... the lighting isn't great but you can still make out her lips!

Thursday, December 17, 2009

i'll update more

tomorrow... lol... i'm just tired today... but i'll put in pictures! Tomorrow is K's 2 week appointment! Can you believe it?!?! i can't! i know that we're going to get yelled at though b/c K still isn't sleeping in her bassinet... she will for like 30mins and then she wants to be with us... i can't get her to be happy unless she's on me! Even during the day i put her in her swing, boucer, etc and she's happy until she wakes up! UH! Oh and forget swaddling... she's not down with that! And the pediatrician that we're going to see tomorrow is the queen of swaddling so i know she's going to yell at me... uh i just don't know what to do... it's let her sleep on  me or no one gets any

Monday, December 14, 2009

Baby Face

I'll tell you one thing the best thing in the world to watch is your baby's face. They don't have a clue what they are doing but it's always so cute! In their sleep they like to smile, laugh, throw in an elvis lip... it just never gets old. Throw in some crazy stretching and your heart will not be your own anymore watching all of this cuteness! (don't worry i'll try to capture pictures... she's just so fast).

Today Chris went back to work... my baby's face wasn't a happy one with this thought... but every time i spoke to him on the phone she would smile at me... i think she knew. (i KNOW smiles at this age are gas but maybe her gas knew!).

So if you're ever having a bad day, go and find a new born baby and watch her sleep... it will make even the meanest person smile!

Birth Story

WEll it sort of started on Wednesday. I was having contractions and went to the doctor after work. They were 8 mins apart and i was 3cm dilated and fully effaced... but that didn't matter because the contractions weren't close enough. So the next day i went to work and started walking with my friend Tina in hopes of starting them again and getting them closer... but the problem was they weren't coming back. I was so bummed. I really thought i had a chance.... So at the end of the day i stood up to get ready to go home and then trickle trickle trickle.... hmm i thought to myself i know i didn't pee myself because, well, i've done THAT before. So i went to the restroom to check things out and i was wet, so i drained my bladder and got my stuff and started to leave. Then *trickle trickle trickle*... so i called Chris and told him i thought my water was breaking... he suggested a call to the doctor. I thought this sounded smart, by the time i got to my car and got a nurse on the phone i was getting little gushes. They told me to go to the hospital so i went on my way. So i drove myself there and Chris left work to meet me. 

I got to labor and delivery and my entire pants from crotch to foot were wet... so what did they make me do??? Stand there for 20mins. Oh wait! i'm sorry they did offer to let me SIT in my own fluid... SO NICE! FINALLY they took me back and let me get changed and into bed... where i kept leaking but what can you do about that. Chris got there shortly after that and the wait was on.

A while later around 5cm or so i opted for a shot in my butt to help with the contractions... walking and other techniques were not making me feel better. Well the butt shot didn't help a TON... a little yes but not a ton... so about 30mins to an hour later i opted for the good stuff... bring on the epidural! OH YEA!

Getting the epi was worth it but not easy. Trying to bend over a huge belly that has not allowed you to bend in 2 months while it's sending shooting pain through your body and being told to not move while you get stuck with needles... yeah not easy. Once it was in... SO worth it! Well, until it started to wear off... yeah i had it start to wear off in 2 places... front right and back right of my body... and it was PAINFUL! But, i had to wait for the anastiologist to come out of the OR for more drugs... one hour of waiting... this is hard when you're 7cm dilated and the contractions are coming every 2 mins... not fun... but when he did get there... FUN!

So lets skip ahead to the nurse FINALLY telling me that i'm 9 1/2 cm but have a "lip" to get out of the way... so she's going to put me on my side for 20 mins then the other side for 20 mins and that should do it... yeah but after being on one side for 10 mins i wanted to push! Chris was trying to tell me to wait that the nurse would be back in 10 mins but i kept telling (okay yelling) him to go and get her. It felt like i needed to take the biggest poop in my life and was told... "hold it for a few hours". YEAH RIGHT! So in comes the nurse, up go my legs and on to the pushing!

For those who don't know they do pushing in rounds with your contractions. You'll push 3-4 times in each round while the nurse counts to 10. And let me tell you that count to 10 gets longer and longer each time! The first two rounds were good b/c i needed to push so badly... the rest were "special". i was getting pretty tired... it gets hard to breath too and you start to feel like you can't keep going. Chris and the nurse kept saying stuff like "I see her hair" "I see this much of her head" ... so i responded with "THAT'S NOT ENOUGH HEAD!" "THERE'S STILL MORE TO COME!" "JUST PULL HER OUT!". They told me they couldn't "pull her out" just like that... so then they started holding my legs up all the time rather than letting them down between rounds... this did NOT make me happy. I kept telling them to put my legs down and they said if they did then she would be sucked back up in the birth canal. GREAT!

Well after 45 mins of pushing she came out with a big gush of fluid. As the doctor was turning her to get her shoulders out she noticed that the cord was around her neck so she started pulling as i was pushing. Kinsley came out at 3:31am... the doctor unwrapped her, let Chris cut the cord, laid her on my chest and they started to clean her. She wasn't crying so they took her to the warmer and gave her oxygen and had a neo-natal nurse look at her. She was doing fine, just didn't want to cry... they had to tube her stomach too since some of the oxygen went into it and bloated it.

After what seemed like forever, but was only maybe 15 mins, they gave her to Chris while the doctor finished with me. I had a smaller than a one degree tear but my placenta did not want to come out... BUT finally after lots of tugging and massaging (which by the way is painful) it released itself.

SO now my baby girl and i could be reunited, where she latched onto my boob immediately! lol.

Kinsley Grace was 8lbs and 21 inches long. Her head was 13inches around and perfect in every way!

Saturday, December 12, 2009

She's just so cute... even when my nipples bleed

I'm working on the birth story but we've been having breast feeding issues.... well I've been having issues.... Kinsley is going GREAT! I have extremely sore and cracked nipples... i wouldn't wish this pain on anyone. The other night Chris had to visit like 5 stores to get me shields... they work... but i'm still not really healing... i've looked for tips on how to heal them so we're working that... but i refuse to give up! My baby loves my boobie milk and i won't take it from her. I'll update you more on this... but for now here's the pics we're using on the Christmas card!

Alright well my little piranha needs a diaper change and then that normally means it's time to eat. Off to see the cuteness!

Monday, December 7, 2009

More pics

Baby is going to wake soon so no birth story yet... but here's some more of our angel... PS anyone know how to get her to sleep AT NIGHT and in HER bassinet and not ON me???

A little hug for Sasha, Papa Mutt, and Uncle Seph! "come see me soon"

New Family!

She loves her daddy!

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Guess Who's Here!!!!

Chris and my beautiful daughter came into the world yesterday December 4th at 3:31 in the morning. After having my water break right as i was leaving work and push finally for 45mins we were able to hold her! She was born at 8 lbs exactly and 21 inches. I'll bore you with all the details of everything later but i'll give you what you want for now... PICTURES!!!!

This is what i looked like after we finally got moved into our room... i don't even care! i have my baby!

Proud Daddy!

look at all that hair! you know i had to put a bow in it!

Kinsley sends some elvis love to ya'll!

And PS. We just got back from our breastfeeding class... yeah, Kinsley was the best and got a gold star! She's my little super star!

Thursday, December 3, 2009


Well yesterday i noticed some contractions and was wondering what the deal was so my nurse told me to come in and get monitored and checked out. I go in and i'm being monitored for like 2 hours (yeah i think they forgot about me) and i was having contractions 8 mins apart... same as Monday except i REALLY felt these.

So then Dr. Doom comes in, and you know what? He has lost the name Dr. Doom... i like him now! I'm a full 3cm and fully effaced! He was like "you CAN go to the hospital but i might wait until the contractions are more like 5-6 mins apart." So home i went.

They kept up until i went to sleep and then faded off. When i would get up to pee i would feel one and that was about it. Then i woke up at 2/2:30 and couldn't sleep so i went down stairs to read my book and that was it.

Today i will walk again in hopes of getting them going strong again and hopefully be rewarded with a trip to the hospital!

We'll see!

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Contractions are a tease!

So yesterday i was feeling them! Especially on the way home and once i got home. Last night Chris and i were cleaning and putting away laundry and they just kept on coming! I was telling Chris "okay get the lab top, lets start timing them!" So i sit down on the bed and wait for the next one to hit the start button and... NOTHING!

I mean i still had contractions but they were so far apart it was pointless to track them. UH! I was almost convinced that i was going to the hospital last night! Oh well on to another day~

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Dear Kinsley, We're 39 weeks!

Dear Baby girl,

Well we've made it to 39 weeks. You are now a BIG healthy girl! Mommy got to see you yesterday and you waved at me! It was so cute to watch your little hand open and close and think that soon i will be seeing it in person!

Soon i'll be holding you, wiping your little butt, and putting big huge bows in your hair! I dream about the first time i get to see your little face and i dream about the doctors placing your in your daddy's arms!

Baby girl, this has been a long time coming and your Daddy and I couldn't be more excited to meet you! We love you so much already, i can't even put it into words. So do your thing and come on out, there's lots of people that can't wait to meet you!

Here's our picture, hopefully the next one of "us" will be with you in my arms!

Love you baby girl! See you soon!


Not quite sure how to write this...

So i have come to the understanding that this blog is basically a bitchfest-2000 type blog. Where i complain and complain and complain about pregnancy. So i'm going to take a minute to first explain myself and then tell you what is good about pregnancy.

I started this blog to 1. capture all the ins and outs of this process and preserve them. and 2. to inform others that have not been pregnant about the side of pregnancy people don't talk about so that if you're experiencing these problems you know you're not some sort of freak.

With that being said, often my post come across as me complaining and has left people baffled why i'm so miserable if i wanted this so badly.

Now i will address these concerns. I have ALWAYS wanted to be a mommy. As long as i can remember back that has been one of my biggest dreams. And once i finally met the man of my dreams then my Mommy dream became obsessive. Once we got married and i widdled down his defenses and got him on the baby train it was all i could do to contain myself. I wanted to be pregnant and have a cute bump and feel baby kick. The thing is... nothing is EVER how  you dream it.

Getting pregnant was and still is magical. The thought that you have a life inside of you is BEYOND amazing. Feeling the kicks and flutters is so touching and emotional that i can't even put into words how special it is. Seeing your baby on a ultra-sound (i don't care if you have 2 or 10) is a gift from God each time.

BUT no matter how magical it all is you are never ready for the not so sparkly side of pregnancy. You think yeah i might have morning sickness, yeah i'll bet some swelling will come, i've heard that my boobs might hurt and constipation might become an issue. But you're not ever prepared for everything, like baby moving your tail bone, the return of a polynatal cyst, rashes you've never heard about, just how ugly stretch marks REALLY are, and just how hard bending over or getting up will be.

If you want a child bad enough you kind of block out these "warnings" from other mothers because you think this Pregnancy will be a breeze for me! And honestly, compared to many other women it has been a breeze for me... but i don't care who you are, the last month is never a breeze for anyone and if you say it was for you, then you're lying.

No matter how badly you want a child, it' doesn't make it easier when you are waking up every hour of the night. It's not any easier to walk when your entire pelvic region is in pain and you get lighting crotch with every step you take. That sometimes your belly is so sensitive that the slightest brush up against something makes you gasp in pain.

Despite all of these "complaints", do you want this child any less? No. Does it make it any less of a miracle? NO. Would you do it again and again? Yes. BUT these are the facts, no matter how magical and amazing pregnancy is, it's still gross and uncomfortable.

So now that i feel i've explained myself i'm going to list the parts of pregnancy that are truly amazing to me....

feeling Kinsley move
seeing her on a sonogram
having Chris touch my belly
sharing moments with my mom
planning and decorating for her
praying for her health every night
Seeing my belly take shape as she grows
Watching my belly have a dance party after meals
Knowing that i will be holding her in my arms
Knowing that God has blessed me with the greatest gift of all

Pregnancy itself is not all it's cracked up to be, it's messy, hard, uncomfortable, but SOOO worth it. No matter what i've complained about i would do it again and again just for this little girl! But it's still nice to be able to get it out and have other women relate!

Monday, November 30, 2009


So this morning i go to my doctors office. I get there and am told she's not there b/c of a family emergency. Well that's too bad, who will i be seeing? Well she's our only OB for the day. OKay so what are we going to do... this is where the incompitent staff looks at me like "what do you mean". What I MEAN is i'm 39 weeks pregnant and i want a status update bitches so figure this out!

So after my sonogram (which baby looks great in) i go to the other office, 20 mins away. See a doctor that tells me i have not changed AT ALL from last week. GREAT! BUT he thinks i need a non-stress test done since baby isn't moving as much anymore.

I'm sitting here thinking 1. DUH baby isn't moving as much, there's NO WHERE TO GO! and 2. She was GREAT in the sonogram, moved, etc. So WHY do i have to get this "test done" and he says standard, blah blah blah.

Basically they put two monitors on you, one for heart beat and movement and the other for contractions. Or something like that.

So OVER to labor and deliver i go (yes the place at the hospital). They take me into triage and hook me up and i sit... and sit... and sit. I see baby is moving, heart beat is great, and i'm contracting (even though they are 8 mins apart and i don't feel them all). So what does all this mean??? NOTHING... just that baby is healthy (YEA, but DUH already knew that!).

So there ends my morning. 4 hours of leave WASTED to still be pregnant! GREAT! THANKS!

So this weekend we've tried sex, walking, raspberry tea, rolling on an exercise ball, rolling hips like i'm washing the floor... basically i've tried EVERYTHING by castor oil... got any tips??? i can't take this much longer!

Saturday, November 28, 2009

She is still in there!

So i had REAL hopes that she would come this week... but so far no luck. I know it's not over yet but MAN can't she come?!?!?

Since she hasn't come we've taken advantage and decorated the house for christmas, finished out Christmas shopping with some black friday door busters! AND i've wrapped all those gifts!

Last night for all of 15 mins it was looking promising! lol. I had this HORRIBLE and i mean HORRIBLE pain in my left side... felt like (but worse) i pulled a muscle or something and it was making me contract. So for like 15 mins i was dying trying to find out if i should wake Chris up... but then it started to slow down... i layed down and bam it was over. STILL didn't sleep though!

Sleep lately has been non-existant. I sleep for MAYBE an hour at a time... i'll wake up at 2 or 4 in the morning WIDE AWAKE and then i feel like a zombie the rest of the day until i practically FALL into bed to realize i'm still not going to be sleeping~ Joy!

So here's to keep our fingers crossed, the weekend isn't over yet!


Oh and PS for those of you wondering what the end feels like??? My coochy hurts... yes, not just every bone and muscle around it but like the front bottom area, it feels like she's trying to escape from there rather then the exit hole. It's terrible. Makes walking VERY hard.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

OMG! SOOO in love!

No i'm not talking about that tall drink of water that impregnated me (even though he is quite hot)... i'm talking about Frosted Flake Cereal! So i hadn't had this stuff in FOREVER and when we were at our friends wedding in NY the bed and breakfast we stayed at had this. SO i decided to have some, YUM! Well i promptly forgot about the awesomeness of it's taste until this past weekend at the g-store. I got a box (well the store brand kind) for breakfast this week. And i'm sitting here enjoying every mouth stimulating bite of it!

This cereal is AWESOME! Not only does the sweetness do my taste buds good but the flakes don't get all mushy! AND THEN spoon after spoon of crunchy sweet goodness i get to drink the milk left at the bottom of the bowl, WHICH IS HEAVEN! Not only is it Milk (one of my favorite drinks of late) but it's SWEET milk, sweetened from the tantalizing flakes themselves!

Ahhh what an amazing breakfast! Now if all this sugar would make K bounce right out of me!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009


So i went to the OB yesterday to get felt up for my progress and I'm at least 2 1/2 cm dilated (close to 3) and 90% effaced. And since that all mean NOTHING when it comes to when i'll be going into labor i cried. Yes i cried in front of my doctor because she can't induce me until 39 weeks unless there's a medical reason.

I told her how i can't sleep, how i hurt, and how i'm just DONE overall being pregnant.

She suggested how "fun" thanksgiving will be and how i'll get to take a picture of my belly beside the Turkey and i cried more b/c i want Kinsley to take a picture beside the turkey, not Kinsley in my belly!

I almost cried this morning because i slept pretty good last night and i was upset about that because i wanted to be up all night with real, take me to the hospital, contractions.

I know i should be doing a huge Tom Cruise couch dance (maybe i will if it helps this baby get out) for all of my "progress" but since that progress really means NOTHING in the scheme of things, it's hard to dance about it.

But here i am 38wks 2 1/2cm and 90% effaced.

Monday, November 23, 2009

These Freaking Idiots!

That would be my co-workers. yeah!

I would like to call them many other names, a lot harsher, BUT Kinsley can hear me and i don't want to be a bad influence.

It went down like this:

Co-workers: So two weeks huh...blah blah words blah word
Me: Yea but i'm going to BEG my OB for an induction, i'm so done!
CW: WHAT! But you're ONLY 38 weeks!
Me: ONLY!?!? That's full term thanks! and besides this kid is measuring ahead!
CW: But if you're body isn't ready that could be dangerous!
Me: UMMM it's ready, i'm dilating and almost completely effaced!
CW: Um No it IS dangerous for the baby if it's not time
Me: Then take her by C-section
CW: well blah blah words words...

I mean seriously!?!? Do they REALLY think i would pick my comfort over the safety of my child!?!?!?

1st of all She is measuring big
2nd My doc said we won't talk induction unless my cervix is favorable (IT IS!)
3rd What do they think i'm going to do... Go to my local CVS and pick up an "At home induction Kit" if my doctor tells me to wait?!?!?

These people have another thing coming if they think they can gang up on a pregnant lady that is STILL at work even though everyone wants me to go ahead and start my Maternity leave! I have a letter opener and i know how to use it!

Pregnancy + Kids do not mix

So i know what you're thinking... wait... You're pregnant to HAVE a kid, how does that not mix.... so let me rephrase that: Pregnancy + Kids on the OUTSIDE do not mix.

We had a friend over yesterday with his three children. Twins age 7 and son who is almost 5. Now while they are EXTREMELY well behaved, polite, sweet, and i just love them to pieces. I'm 38 weeks pregnant and tired and my belly hurts. So even the most well behaved children need attention, etc. And i did my best to give it to them but MAN i was sooo worn out when they left. LOL, i went and tried to take a relaxing bath, fell asleep. Went down stairs to eat cereal for dinner and then BEGGED Chris to let me go to bed (at 700) even though he wanted to hang out. I eventually made it to bed and it was NOT restful!

I tossed and turned (which is NO small feat), I peed... a lot, and through it all my belly was in huge pain. It wasn't like "OH i'm having another contraction" pain it was "i just did a thousand sit ups" pain. I think part of it has to do with a little old wives tail Chris and i were working on that morning but maybe it's Kinsley beating me up from the inside.

Here's a shot of me yesterday trying to support my team (that lost, we're not talking about that)...

Then i had a conversation with my Dad last night... went something like this:

Me: So i have a doctors apt. tomorrow, i'm going to beg, plead, and cry for an induction.
Dad: Why?
Me: B/c i'm so done being pregnant, i'm so tired and sore
Dad: Well you want her to be healthy
Me: She is, she was last week, she's just getting fatter and harder to push out now
Dad: It's only two weeks left
Me: Have you ever been pregnant?
Dad: No and nor will i ever
Me: Exactly, enough said... i want an induction!

Men will never understand where we're coming from... i've had hormone scares, tail bone issues, cyst, hip pain, swelling, and now a belly that is bigger then me. I am VERY grateful that is my full list of complaints and it doesn't include anything serious, but still... I'm DONE! I don't want to be pregnant anymore. I want to hold my little girl and put on pants that zip up. I want to be able to kiss my little girl and put on underwear without grunting! I want to be able to feed my little girl and be able to go up stairs without needing to take a break halfway through.

PLEASE just let the doctor give me my wish!

Sunday, November 22, 2009

okay sorry, i complain a lot... now i won't

So this post is not going to be about complaining, it's going to be about the sweetest man ever, my husband.

I mean ya'll know we aren't perfect but man was my world perfect yesterday with him. There is just something about a man, his blue jeans, and his boots!

We went to church yesterday morning and He wore some boot cut jeans, a button up green shirt, and cowboy boots. He walked down those stairs and my heart did a little flip flop flutter! Something about my big tall rugged man in his boots and jeans! I swoon just thinking about him in it! He looks so classic and amazing in such a mainly earthy way that it just reminds me time and time again why i knew from the second i laid eyes on him that HE was going to be MINE!

Then when that rugged man of my dreams makes me lunch, fixes pillows for me, and makes sure i'm happy and THEN rubs my belly and talks about our daughter, i really almost burst with happiness!

So ladies be thankful for Boots and jeans and then men that fill them in our lives. Without him, i would be so lost!

Friday, November 20, 2009


This is for the delivery guy who just came into my office to have me sign a packing slip and said "You have a nice size belly there". I mean REALLY!?!?!? Okay i GET what you meant but REALLY!?!?!?!

So yes, it's Friday. I have made it another week, joy! The stroller arrived last night and i was dealing with Braxton Hick contractions for much of the night... but I have made it another week.

Everyone keeps making stupid comments, suggestions, tips, etc... but it's Friday and i've made it another week.

I peed myself a little sneezing and I've snarked out at least 3 people so far, but it's Friday and i've made it another week.

And yes "I'm STILL HERE!"

Happy Friday, now BACK OFF!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Yummy! Mucus Plugs!!!

So i think i might be loosing my mucus plug. I think i'm a gradual kind of girl... this is about to get WAY TMI so be warned!

I've read that sometimes women have a big glop fall out and that's pretty much their mucus plug falling out... but some loose it gradually and it's like slug trails from hell when you wipe.

Well i went to the restroom and it took 4 wipes for the slugs to slow down... it was a lot of gunk that was a clearish greenish tinge. We'll see if this keeps going...

but don't worry, even IF i'm loosing it... doesn't mean a thing... can still be pregnant for weeks. FUN

You WILL have LOW days!

So i'm sitting here trying not to curse like a sailor (to keep my mom proud of me) but seriously i'm over it all!

1. we went to visit ANOTHER daycare last night since ours aren't looking too hot on the wait list right now and while we liked it, we can't afford it. I mean seriously... why do you have to pay $1200+ for childcare! for ONE child!!! Are these people batty?!?!? I thought the two we were waiting on for 1045-1140 a month were crazy but this one last night was 1320... that's only for a 4 week month! WHAT THE HELL! AND HALF the teachers BARELY spoke english! Great for my kid who will one day be able to tell me to f-off in 3 different languages one day but not for me when i'm trying to figure out if they are telling me my kid pooped or talked!

2. I'm SO DAMN tired i almost cried this morning. DID i stay up last night hosting a rave at my house??? no. Did i stay up late to finish that book i was reading? no. Was i in any kind of labor? no. I ACTUALLY fell asleep around 9 on the couch. Then went to bed.. peed like 3-4 times... slept so soundly i would wake up in buckets of my own sweat... AND I'm still about to prop my eyelids up with tooth picks! I pity the person who says (like they always do) "You're still here" first today. Because guess what?!?! I DON'T WANT TO BE RIGHT NOW! I WANT TO SLEEP YOU STUPID *#UROEWHR*#RY!!!!

3. I'm emotionally drained and want this kid out. I love her, i can't wait to hold her (ON THE OUTSIDE) but i just want her out. I can't take the stress, the worry, the is it time yet, the "you're still heres"... I just want to have her and snuggle with her!

4. My f-in lab has ANOTHER urinary track infection... yeah she's peeing on the carpet we just shampooed! ARE YOU FREAKIN KIDDING ME! I just got the house ready and this twerp (i love her i know it's not her fault) has to do this! So i come home each day to the lovely smell of pee and have to get on my hands and knees (which hurt like hell lately) and clean up her pee. Thanks... so lets add another $300 vet visit onto the stress!

Okay, i would love to thank you for letting me get all this out BUT i still don't feel better. IF i could get a nap, find a daycare and loose my mucus plug all in one day then i MIGHT be on the road to recovery.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009


That i might be having contractions last night... not oh this is it i'm GOING to the hospital... but Oh my body is revving up! Maybe some real ones will be coming this week or next!

BUT then i moved Sadie so her feet weren't touching me and the "contractions" went away and i realized it was just Kinsley being pissed that her sister was "touching" her.

Yeah so not even are there no contractions but I'm already dealing with "Mom! She's TOUCHING me!!!!"


Oh an update to baby world... her car seat is IN my car! weird i know but we need to be ready!

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Dear Kinsley, 37weeks

Dear Kinsley,

Here's you and i at 37 weeks. You're full term today! Good job! It's now safe for you to come into the world so, PLEASE come! Your Daddy and i are very excited to meet you. I already love you more then i thought possible and so does he. Daddy gives you goodnight, good morning, i'm home, hey how ya doing rubs every time he sees you!

We're very excited to see what you look like, if you'll take after me or Daddy. We know that no matter what you're going to be perfect, just the way God intended for you to be!

I can't believe that the time of you kicking in my belly and making it hard to move is almost over. Even though i've complained a lot it was worth every single second. Feeling you stretch and move is just magical, thanks for letting Daddy feel you lately too, you should see the smile on his face!

Well i know you still have a few weeks left if you want but we're really excited to meet you soon! You're nursery is all ready, your sisters (Stella and Sadie) are ready, and we even got your stroller ordered! So don't wait too long to make your debut! And don't believe what you hear about "fashionably late"... it's not all it's cracked up to be! TRUE divas like to arrive early and make sure everyone is ready for them!

Well i love you baby girl, i can't wait to kiss your nose, fingers, and toes! You're so special to everyone already and i know you'll just take the world by storm when you come!

Love Always,


Wow so we're full term now...


Yes we're 37 weeks. That means we're "full term" and it's Perfectly safe for baby to come out... So i wish she would take the hint! i mean I'm good... the cyst is all healed and my butt is functional again... but really... do you know what it's like carrying around 35 extra pounds that are pounding into your pelvis with every step you take??? Yeah, i'm over it! I mean i LOVE her little kicks but really i'm okay with feeling them on the outside!

So i was waiting to write this big long horrible post about BabiesRus b/c my stroller was out of stock and i was worried that when it came back IN stock the free shipping promotion would be over and then i would have to pay an extra like $20 for shipping... so i called/emailed their customer service to express this concern and they kept blowing me off (like 5 times no joke) BUT i was FINALLY (after 2 weeks) able to order my stroller and the Free shipping promotion was still going on SO i'm not going to write a big long entry about how terrible BabiesRus's customer service is, and how they do not answer your questions, instead giving you the run around, and about how they lie lie lie... b/c i DID after all get my stroller with free shipping... so here's me being quite about how terrible BabiesRus is...

And on to other news, we're still looking for a daycare... fun stuff i know... do you have ANY idea how problematic this whole thing is?!?!? I mean you have to get on waiting list, then you have to compete with parents that are already at that daycare and decide to get sperminated again. THEN i'm finding out you ALSO have to compete with workers that are newly hired and bring their babies with them! UH! So we're going to tour another place... they have an opening.. at the moment... i hate to find out how much they are though!

We'll see~

Monday, November 16, 2009

i am....

still pregnant... yep still going strong. Went to the doctor today and i'm still 2 cm but now i'm 80% effaced. So we're progressing but not how i want to... i want to progress right on my way to the hospital (well at the moment i want to progress to bed b/c i'm so freakin tired)! I'm tired, i'm big, i'm ready to see my little angel!

Oh the bad news front... my work will most likely only let me take 6 weeks of paid leave... anything else will be unpaid. I had already planned on 4 weeks of unpaid leave but not 6! (i wanted to take 12 weeks off). So i'm super bummed... Chris and i are going to talk tonight but i can't see 6 weeks with no pay! that's a lot!

Well back to work... so tired! Just want to hold her!

Friday, November 13, 2009

Please tell the co-workers to back away slowly

Or i can't be held accountable for what i could do to them!

So a few (the ones i like) know that i'm 2cm dilated and 70% effaced. But for some reason they are all hopping up on their couches Tom Cruise Style telling me K's going to be early! I mean seriously, most of them have given birth... they KNOW i could be this way for WEEKS! But does that stop them??? NO!

My boss is all freaking out wanting me to get my list made of the status of everything on my desk in case she needs to step in... okay i GET that but really that list will change COMPLETELY in a week and THEN i'll have to make ANOTHER one!

My co-workers are making guesses about when NEXT WEEK i'll deliver or if i'll even make it that long. This is all making me antsy in my pants!!

here's the cake topper... the kind amazing angels making my pumpkin spice lattes at Starbucks are even on a count down! SERIOUSLY!?!? I order coffee from you and yes even though i feel deeply bonded to you since you give me a sense of peace and relaxation at 630 in the morning all i ACTUALLY say to you is "decaf venti skim pumpkin spice latte no whip please, thank you" so now you're asking me how many weeks, or telling me how many weeks are left or saying you figured i went into labor b/c you hadn't seen me in a few days... Seriously... do i need to add Starbucks to my "Call b/c i'm in labor list"???

So people while i'm very excited about my "progress" you are making me Crazy! I know i've said FOREVER to get this kid out of me, but NOW i'm freaking out and i want her to stay put... so DON'T encourage her!


So my nesting isn't exactly typical...

So last night I got this crazy urge. I couldn't sit still... i wanted to organize, clean, put batteries in things. And that lasted for all of well 40 minutes, maybe... lol. Then i promptly became tired and lazy and went to read a book in bed.

It was really funny in my head b/c at first i was all like "sweet! I'm SOOO nesting, look at me!" and then i wasn't... and i began thinking why aren't i like everyone else... why don't i want to "nest" and then i realized that do, just in my own way.

I nest the best way i know how... i shop, lol. I want to make sure we've bought everything little K is going to need. I organize what i've bought and then feel the need to buy more... not Chris's favorite trait of mine.

So i'm going to do my best and NOT nest... IF i can't ignore the urge i'll try to turn it into something productive, like real nesting... lets see how this goes.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Baby Shower #2!

These are a little late in coming but here is my baby shower from my awesome co-workers!

I will pretext this with, it was casual Friday, i wasn't supposed to know about the shower and my tush was KILLING me... i only came to work that day b/c i DID know about is. But i think the photographer did everything she could to make me look like crap...

yumm i just love potlucks!

Yes i was given a crown... b/c everyone knows i'm a princess... don't worry i'm giving it to K.

Why yes that is my tush pad under my butt... only way they would get a smile out of me!

CAKE! But seriously, you MIGHT be turning your baby shower conisour(sp?) nose up to this cake but DON'T! this cake is from Super Target! It tasted SOOO good! I mean i went back and back and back (hey they brought it back to our lunch room RIGHT next to my desk! Of course i had to eat it!

Some of the lab peeps relaxing after the food!

It was so special. They not only threw me a beautiful shower BUT they also got me all the little things i needed AND a gift card to get my Stroller with!! YEA!

Thanks guys!

Here i am!

This is what you look like when you're 2 cm dilated!

oh please you didn't think i was going to show you something else did you? this is not the discovery channel! moving on to the belly

Well Harvey (my foot) is doing better, i've found that if i wear these workout compression shocks it really helps with the swelling... i was even able to put them on MYSELF this morning!!! Because my tush is doing SOOO much better! Still stiff and stuff but it's SOOO doable compared to where i was at on Monday! I feel like a new woman... i feel like i can keep doing this pregnancy thing for WEEKS (which is good since i might have to)!

K is moving less but bigger now. It's no longer a party in my uterus but more like a mime box that she is trying to explore. I'll get an elbow sticking out here and a knee there, it's really funny to watch and when i tickle it she moves it, so i tickle it there and she moves it again! Already my baby girl and i are playing!

On to the "pregnancy stuff"... So my body is cleaning itself off. I feel like my IBS is back b/c of all the loose poops i've had! And now we're getting the glorious slug trails. Many women get these all through pregnancy but mine are just starting. So my lady napkin in place i inspect each one... is that just regular goo or the start of a mucus plug goo!?!?!? Hmmm

For those of you wondering this is the definition of a mucus plug: the mucus plug is just an accumulation of secretions that form within the opening to the uterus, also called the cervical canal. The fact that mucus accumulates early in pregnancy is quite beneficial, as it serves to create a protective barrier against infection between the outside world and your growing baby.

As you near the end of your pregnancy, your cervix will begin to thin out and dilate. As it changes, you may lose your mucus plug and find a gooey deposit in your underwear or on the toilet tissue after wiping. It is not uncommon for this mucus to be mixed with brown, pink, or red streaks of blood from the changes occurring within your cervix. Some women may lose the plug at 36 weeks' gestation, while many others may not lose it until labor has begun. Sometimes moms-to-be may not even notice that they are losing their mucus plug because it happens gradually, over several weeks, and they've already grown accustomed to varying but increased amounts of the vaginal discharge that often accompanies a normal pregnancy.

So you see i COULD be loosing it right now... in bits and pieces... but that doesn't mean much for the onset of labor sadly since many women do not go into labor for one or two weeks AFTER loosing this disgusting thing.

this is where it's coming from:

and here's some photography about the whole dilation/effaced thing:

Hope this helps a little bit!

Tuesday, November 10, 2009


Well to me it is! First lets start from the beginning...

I woke up yesterday in so much pain, pain that had been building for days... pain that made me almost forget that i am pregnant b/c i could only feel this pain... Guess everyone who called me a pain in their ass is getting their revenge on me now huh? haha... okay yes that was too easy...

so i go to work and show my body's handy work to my co-work to which i get "Holy crap that's terrible, put that away!" SO yes it's not all in my mind... just my butt. I call my trusty little surgeon (he is little i'm taller than him... he's a cute little old man, makes me laugh, when he's not making me cry)... they tell me he is all booked that day... UNTIL they get my name... MRS. BREEDLOVE!!! Let me just run in the back and talk to him for YOU! (No i'm not making this up... apparently my body malfunctions make me a celebrity in this office!) "Oh yes we can squeeze you in at 1" GREAT! I'll be there!

I arrive... "Oh look at you! How exciting" Then my little man comes in... "Oh yes, have you had a polyonatal Cyst before?" Umm yes i say, you removed it (okay so i'm not legendary... THEY still know me!). "Alright turn over and try to keep breathing" he says... great i knew this was going to happen, i wanted this to happen, but now i'm terribly upset this is happening.

Numbing needle, cut cut, squish squish, taping of a very large maxi pad on my butt (which in case you are wondering, i'm NOT wearing the proper pants to disguise) and i'm all done! See you on Thursday!

So i'm now waddling around with a HUGE pad on my butt, now covered by tying a hoody around my waist (wait i don't have one of those, okay under the belly that is NOW my waist) and i'm waiting until my next doctors appointment, my weekly checkin with the OB!

Finally after an hour of trying to get comfortable i just go to the OB (even though a previous call informed me they could not squeeze me in earlier, so much for being a "celebrity"). I sign in and BEG (with tears in my eyes... critical!) if i could lay in room while i wait since i can't sit. YES they say! Wonderful!

I lay (reading) for a while... eventually get my sonogram (K's doing great!) and then *dom dom dom* they put me in another room for my FIRST (well i mean first we're officially looking for progress here) internal! Yes this is where my cervix gets felt up. Many women hate this... b/c well it doesn't exactly feel good... i mean it's not like she's trying to start something with me, just trying to see if K's starting something. But i'm all excited just to see what might be going on... plus THIS pain is NOTHING compared to where i just was...then i hear the words

There's her head "WAIT", i say, "You feel her HEAD!" Oh yes she does and she says MORE "You're two centimeters dilated and about 70% effaced"!!!!

Okay for you non-baby factories out there here's the break down of all of that...

Effaced is your cervix... you want it to thin out and get out-of-the-way... you have to be 100% to give birth.

Dilated is where your cervix is opening up... you start at zero and must get to 10 to push the kid out.

So WOW this is like HUGE progress, send me to the hospital right? NO... see you can be this "far along" for WEEKS!

But you know i don't care... after all the pain i've been going through this past week it was so great to hear those words of progress! So amazing! Just thinking that Kinsley is doing and my body is doing what it needs to do to bring me this little Angel... it just makes it all worth it and takes my breath away!

36wks today!



**side not for those who read this for information... Internals aren't pleasant but aren't terrible. You WILL most likely bleed after them... i'm still bleeding today... today is brown and we all know brown is old which equals GOOD**

oh and my bootay is feeling much better... sore but i can actually lay down now!!



Monday, November 9, 2009

I'm serious! CUT IT OFF!

My Ass... please please please! I haven't slept in i don't know how long b/c i'm in SOOO much pain!!! I'm trying to deal with it by taking Tylenol but it only takes the edge off! I'm convinced now that it's not a tail bone issue or spinal issue, it's another cyst. It's huge right now... bruised and inflaming my old scars from getting the other cyst removed. I'm hoping to have an update of what i can do today about it... B/c here's where i think my options MIGHT be...

1. Take an antibiotic (perfect choice...if it works... and if it's allowed... this is what i prefer)

2. Get it lanced/operated on (yeah great lets have a healing hole ON MY BUTT right before i go into labor... which will have me LAYING ON MY BUTT!)

3. Deal with it until K's born (oh this is EVEN better... besides labor pain i'll have cyst pain AND i'll still have to get it taken care of AND recover WHILE taking care of K.... umm no)

So lets cross our fingers for an antibiotic... i can't deal with this much longer.... I can't sit, lay, sleep, walk, you name it without being in EXTREME pain!

Friday, November 6, 2009

So how many doctors do you need

in order to make it through pregnancy? With me... apparently a lot. I need my OB and all her team. I need my sonogram team (which i will be seeing weekly now), i need my happy pill doctor, and NOW i need a chiropractor! Yep the tail bone/ spine/ pelvis is SOO bad i'm seeing a chiropractor. HOPEFULLY he'll have success where others have failed b/c i really can't take much more of this.

I'm trying to decide if i'm just going to move my office into the ladies room... i mean hey, on my floor it's a one person only deal so it's not like i'll be "sharing" my office. And frankly that's the only place where my ass doesn't hurt. Yes ladies and gentlemen and i'm pissed and over this dagum ass pain! I found some relief with Tylenol and a heating pad (straight on the crack... i mean there was a pants barrier) but it's there still... even my ass pillow is not helping this thing. SO i'm seeing a man now who sends vibrations to various points in my butt to see if he can "giggle" things back into place.

My biggest fear right now??? Well you know how i've been praying, begging, bribing God to let this child come a little early??? Yeah that's my biggest fear now... that God will actually listen to my crazy rantings just to get me to shut up and she'll be here early... i'll have to lay ON MY BACK (which is something i cannot do right now with out screaming and crying) and i will have to push a child through the very area that is taring me apart. Yeah Wouldn't that feel just terrific? HELL NO! So now i want her to stay put until we get this worked out or else i should not be held accountable for anything i say, do, or throw in labor and delivery.

thank you

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Wanna see K's room???

It's all done... now i just need to get the car seat in my car and get Chris to set up the monitors! Hospital bag and baby bag are in the car (just incase something happens at work) and all the clothes are washed and her stuff is set up around the house just waiting for my little princess to get here... now THE ROOM!

Here's her little night light... i'm going to put a picture of the dogs in it... they'll guard her!


Here's some close ups of the baby blanket i made her... started it the weekend after we found out i was pregnant.




and lastly a close up of the Christmas stocking i made her!


Hope you enjoyed her room! Chris and I do... we can't wait for her to get here to show it to her! I know her furry sisters love it!