Coming up on this episode...

So I think I might have hand, foot, mouth disease... PLEASE pray that if I do my kids don't get it because IT SUCKS!
I won't be getting a basement any time soon because we need a new roof, windows, doors, and siding, oh and planels in our fireplace.

Confused by all of this... i'll update you in detail later~

Dear Parker

Dear Parker,

Mommy hasn't written you all the letters that I wrote to Kinsley and I'm very sorry for that. It's not because I love you any less, it's because Mommy is just crazy scatterbrained right now and often I'm more caught up in feeding you and calming Kinsley's toddler tantrum then putting down all the sweet thoughts I have about you... but that doesn't mean I don't have them, OFTEN!

I don't think I've told you how blessed I feel to have you in my life. You are such a happy baby that I enjoy calling my chunker. You're not chunky, you're quite solid (as your Daddy would say), but you're larger then Kinsley so you're Momma's chunker! You are the reason, lately, that Momma has good days. Whenever I'm tired or getting upset about your sisters phases you always make it better! Your smile and the way you light up whenever anyone gives you any attention just makes Momma's heart smile!

I have to say though that I LOVE watching you and sissy together. You love her! You will watch her and be calmed by her. You would rather have her crawling all over you then to snuggle with Momma. It's a blessing to see, because guess what, she LOVES you too. SO much. She's so protective of you. She'll tell me when you're hungry, when you've pooped, she'll protect you from doggie licks and from things you shouldn't play with around the house. You essentially have two Mommies when she's around!

I also feel so lucky to see you with Daddy. You are the little man he so desperately wanted but didn't want to admit (because he would have loved another daughter too). Watching him look at you and play with you I can see all the dreams he has for you in his eyes. He dreams of teaching you how to hit a baseball, to throw the perfect spiral, to bait your hook, and how to steady your riffle. You and Daddy are going to be such good friends!

There are a few things that I want to make sure you know though, just in case.
First, GO TO CHURCH and love the lord! If you do this then SO many things will be better in your life. You need God, and not just on Sunday's. God will help you to be a better man, husband, and father.
Second, I love you more than life itself. I loved you before I was even pregnant with you, you are Momma's Bubby.
Be a gentleman. Hold doors for girls, help them down from things, lift things for them, put your hand at the small of their back to lead them, protect them, cherish them. I don't want you to just like and love your wife, I want you to cherish her like the precious gift she is. She will be the mother to your children and you need to show your children every day how much you love their Momma.
Say Mame and Sir even when you're a Sir. It's polite and thoughtful and I just think you should do it.
Don't dip or smoke... nasty, smelly, deadly. enough said.
Don't wear your pants too low or too tight. You're a man, not a hooligan or a girl.
Respect everyone, even those you think might not deserve it. There will be a time when a teacher or boss or someone will come along and you will hate them with every fiber of your being, respect them. They will get their getting, but NOT from you. It will not make you a better person!
Cut your hair and nails. "I really want a guy who can braid their hair and paint their nails with me" said No woman EVER!
Learn to cook. I will help you with this one, but it's such a treat to a woman when her man can do something besides grill a steak.
Go to the theatre. I want you to be a sportsman and rough and tough like your Daddy, but you also need to be cultured and respect the arts (your Daddy does). You never know when through work or life you will need that education and it will enrich your life to love it.
Don't lose your temper. Your Momma has got a hot head and is often too quick to the start, don't be like me. Your Daddy rolls with it, be like him.
When you have children, get down and the floor and play with them. This is a time you won't ever get back and it will develop a bond that cannot be broken. The cleaning can wait, bedtime can wait, play! Be silly! Let your daughter paint your toes!

That's enough for today. You're just growing up so fast already. The other night as I rocked you before laying you in your crib I started to cry. I knew you would be too big, too soon to be rocked to sleep. I also knew you would be my last baby that I get to rock to sleep and as happy as you make me, it breaks my heart. I want to keep you my little Bubby forever and cuddle you close. But, you will grow and I will love every stage you go through because you are you and I love you.

Love forever,
Momma

This is where I talk about how fat I am...

Man doesn't this ever get old? Well deal with it people, this is my own personal sounding board. My own personal "Holy shit why can't I wake up" journal!

My kid and I are officially on a sugar detox. I mean NO I'm not reading every label and banning all things with any form of sugar in them. BUT, no more cookies, no more cake, no more CRAP! Why? Because we have benged like a fat girl at a candy store for the last week and we both feel (and some of us act, not saying names *coughKINSLEYcough*) like crap! And I personally look like it too. My face is breaking out, I've gained 2 pounds. BLAH! I haven't been drinking my water because I'm eating too much CRAP so my supply is going down (thanks also to Parker not feeding well because of teething). It's just CRAP! AH!

We have been overloaded thanks to the grandparents being at our house in some form ALL week last week and me being home all week and well... I love sweets and once I start, I'm like Asian in a hot dog eating contest (too far?) give me more!

So the kid and I are on a detox... know what, I have a problem though... I TOTALLY ate a bowl of ice cream when she went to bed. OMG I'M HIDING MY FOOD!

So yesterday I started drinking the Green Smoothie... It's Greek yogurt, almond milk, a frozen banana, and about 4 cups of baby spinach. Today I also threw in some strawberries. Delish! I have a ham sandwich with more baby spinach and whole wheat for lunch. Lost of fruit and carrots. A light English muffin with natural peanut butter and a banana. I'm trying here people. Last night we had tuna casserole, but i made sure to have a salad too. K LOVES salad with ranch dressing! Score!

I've gotta get this fat girl off my back, we are not friends no matter what she tells you.

How do you stay motivated?

iPhone... the only reason y'all are getting to see pictures! lol

I found my feet!!

Mommy Loves monograms!

Brother sister love~

Gotta love fingers and toes getting painted by Grandma!

Daddy's turn... don't worry he didn't let me leave it on there! lol

OMG I'm going to eat those cheeks!

Loving dress up, luckily she hasn't tried to wear this one out of the house... too big!

This is my daughter... the end.

Parker's first time in a swing... he just chilled... think he liked the breeze!

K found a bunny!

Mommy Daddy time at the winneries with Uncle Dan and Aunt Jessie!

K's first dance class!

Gotta love a cupcake face!

Happy 4th, dang she's so grown up!

Feeding the geese and ducks with Sasha

personal fave!

phases

So kids go through MANY phases in their little lives. Some are fun (dress up... hello cowboy boots EVERY. DAY.) and others will piss you off royally (enter the words "NO" and "MINE!"). Kinsley is experiencing two new phases. The "I'll shut down when you reprimand me" phase and the "I really hate grown men that dress up" phase.

See lately, when anyone but me reprimands her (and sometimes me) she will immediately drop her head and look at the floor, slump her shoulders and just shutdown... sometimes even cry. I know this is a phase but I feel conflicted about it. Are you supposed to nurture her, or will that enforce this behavior? Do I tell her to snap out of it and go sit in timeout until she can listen nicely? Or does that hurt her more? Or, do I ignore it, and what is that teaching her about how she's acting and how to respect elders?

Yesterday Northern Cowboy shouted out a "Stop Kinsley" when she was about to do something she shouldn't and it could have potentially hurt herself. Immediately, head down, shoulders slumped, full on crocodile tears. I want her to know that Mommy and Daddy mean business when we tell her to do (or not do) something, but I also don't want this to continue.

Next new phase, hating men that dress up. Side eyes to Santa, Magicians, and others characters. Some guy was at the library putting on a show of sorts and her daycare went to see him. She sat the whole time with her head buried in her teachers chest. A Magician came the to the daycare to put on a show for the kids, now while she told me all about the bunny coming out of the hat, etc, she sat the whole time on her teachers lap and wouldn't be moved. Lastly, we went to Amish country this past Saturday... we went into a store and there happened to Santa in there (I shit you not, Santa in JULY!)... well Kinsley Lost.Her.Shit. There's no other way to put it. She saw him and went SCREAMING to my legs and wouldn't let go of me crying the whole time. She calmed down as we kept walking through the store and she ran into him again as he was going to his break and WHOA she lost it again. The funny thing about all of these incidents is the hours, days, and weeks following them she will randomly come up to you and say "Mommy, I don't like that man" or "Mommy Santa not my friend".

So what do you do? I understand children have phases and fears. I was scared to sleep with my door closed until I was in middle school. But when is it time to nurture that fear and when is it time to tell them to thoughen up and they are hurting that mans feelings by making them feel like a predator?

Also, is it bad that I want to keep running up to Kinsley and say "LOOK Kinsley, SANTA!!" Bawh hahaha!

potty training follow up

So I just wanted to throw out a quick update to the potty training.

let me begin this by saying, DON'T DO IT! KEEP your kids in diapers forever. When they go to college they are bound to see other people using the potty and will copy them!

Now we chose to do it the hard way and train her ourselves with the help of daycare. OKAY let me rephrase that... Daycare decided to potty train her with the help of us! They are rock stars there I tell you... getting her to using the potty without tears! AMAZING! Here was the problem... when she came home. OFTEN when she came home there were poop and pee accidents, ESPECIALLY poop... boo.

The thing is though that she would POOP at school most of the time IN the potty, she had also pooped a few times in our potties, so i knew SHE knew how to do it. But, she wouldn't! UH! For those of you who don't know, changing a kid who pooped in their underwear sucks. It makes me want to gauge my eyes out with a spoon. I would rather throw her in the bathtub and just hose her down in her clothes until the poop is gone, rather then change her and clean her up. SUCKS. Even worse because you have to throw some crap her way about how it's okay and she'll do better next time. When you REALLY want to scream WHY DIDN'T YOU GO IN THE POTTY??!?! YOU KNOW HOW TO! YOU'RE SO GROSS! But, that kind of talk is frowned upon in the potty training world... and I'm NOTHING if not politically correct, right? *cough cough*

So what was our turning point? Minnie Mouse panties. She already had some, but I happened to stumble across another pack and since she was pooping out hers (and you better believe I threw away 80% of those rather than clean them) I bought them. I brought them home and she saw them and WANTED THEM like fat girl wants a cupcake. But I had an amazing moment of clarity. I told her she could only have them once she pooped in the potty 5 times. And you know what? Girl did it and didn't have any accidents! I'm not shitting (har har) you! Over the next few days she actually but her poop IN the potty and earned her panties! So we went out and got her a new "prize" (matchbox cars) and every time she pooped in the potty she got a car. In the last week plus, the kid has only had 2 pee accidents and one poop. AND that was with us taking cars trips AND spending the night away from home! She POOPED at OTHER people's houses!!! Hot Shit (har har)!

Here's my pointers.
1. Books suck, but read them... you'll find one good tidbit in each one
2. Once you start DON'T go back... we had to at one point because of a random stomach bug and it hurt us
3. Pull-ups are pointless except for naps and night time (I'm not ready to potty train there yet)
4. two words "Thick" "Underwear". Get it. That thin shit with characters on it is only good for bribery... NOT for stopping the pee from ending up a puddle on your floor. The thick stuff catches some, and keeps your little one nice and wet so they get really uncomfortable! TOTALLY AWESOME!
5. Throw that shit away. No seriously. I know it sounds bad to throw away a perfectly good pair of panties but really, are they THAT good? Do you REALLY want to pry them off, scrape them clean (I just threw up in my mouth) and then try to get the poop stains out of them??? No, it's cool, they are cotton, mother nature will forgive you, she wouldn't clean them either... save your sanity for important battles, like fruit snacks and lollipops.
6. Just don't give up, cleaning it up sucks... the potty dance sucks... constantly asking your kid to pee sucks... not having to smell a dirty diaper again is AWESOME!

Good Luck!