So this past weekend the Cowboy and I were going to be tough parents and leave K with my parents for a week. Now when I say week I really mean we were going to leave her on Monday and meet to pick her up on Saturday. So REALLY it was only going to be 5 nights 6ish days. Not even a whole weekend in the mix! We would have had work and life distracting us all week.
So the whole time we're preparing ourselves for HER melt down at us leaving and how my parents would handle HER missing us, etc. But once the goodbye hugs started, SHE wasn't the one crying. Her parents were. ME!
The man and I got into the car and started to drive away. He was silent with a tear here and there. I was a big HUGE crying mess! I kept questioning our decision and he kept reminding me that this was MY decision, NOT his... that is, when he would talk to me. Finally after 10 whole minutes of feeling like my heart had been ripped out of my body I made him (without a lot of reluctance on his part) turn around to go and get her.
I felt TERRIBLE! Here, my parents, who live 7 hours away, had been planning for MONTHS to get to spend 5 nights and 6 days with their granddaughter and I couldn't let them because I couldn't stand the thought of her calling out for me and me not being there. Because I couldn't stand the thought of ending my day alone on the couch rather than walking her around the neighborhood with her stroller, again. Because I couldn't stand to see the sadness in my Man's eyes.
The whole way home (she was oblivious to everything that had happened) I felt torn, should we have just kept driving and gotten over it? Should we turn around and take her back? Am I loosing my mind? Am I a horrible person for doing this to my parents?
Well, we got home. Unpacked. Ate dinner. Then put the babe to bed. I got her ready, Cowboy was on book duty. Normally he'll read, lay her down and then she'll fuss for me to come up and rock her. I sat at the bottom of the stairs waiting. Waiting for her yell for her Momma, like I knew she would at my parents. I waited, and waited. Finally I tiptoed upstairs to see what was going on, My Northern Cowboy, the love of my life, the father of my child and soon to be children was holding his baby girl close and rocking her to sleep. She never called for me because she was in her Daddy's arms.
That moment brought new tears to my eyes and a calm to my heart that we did the right thing in bringing her home with us. Seeing that told me she needs to be with her Momma and Daddy just a little bit longer because it won't be long before she's itching to get away from us. That moment reminded me why I love that man and why I ALWAYS will.