Today is not a good day. In fact it's a pretty shitty day and I'm not going to joke about it.
Today I got two bits of news to add to an already awful week, but now putting it all into perspective, what happened to me this week was a walk in the park.
This morning my husband called me at work to tell me that his Grandma had passed away last night. We were expecting it but I guess figured it would happen next week. My Mother-in-law is doing well with it, keeping busy with decisions and plans but I know she's still rocked hard.
Then the news that hit me to the core... There's a couple from our old church that we still keeping up with on facebook and stuff. We see them around, etc. Used to be in a bible study with them, we used to go to each other's kids birthday parties. Well they have a little boy who is also named Parker. He's 6 or so months older than my Parker. He's been sick for 2 months and is unusually pale. They took him to the hospital last night with fear of anemia. He isn't anemic... it's much worse. This morning, while I was nursing my own Parker awake, I read that they found out he has leukemia. I cried. I cried for the sweetness in my arms. I cried for the pain they must be feeling. I cried for how hard I'm sure they are hugging their little man right now. I cried that I thought my wreck was SOOO terrible, but in fact I was so lucky! I still have my little man and big girl. My world hasn't been rocked by a devastating blow that can't be fixed with money.
I'm so mad right now. I'm mad that this amazing couple is going through this. I'm mad that there aren't answers and we won't know the out come for years. I'm mad there's nothing I can do except pray. But pray I will. I haven't been the best Christian example lately. I haven't been praying like I should lately, but for the Biggs I will become a prayer Warrior! God may choose to take this little angel to be with him in the future, but I know he has a legacy to leave and a purpose. But, God may also choose to send this family on this awful heart wrenching journey to touch other lives to bring them to Christ and then Parker will grow up to be the man his parents have always dreamed him to be. Whatever the outcome is I will be a prayer warrior for this family. They need strength, they need support, they need their little boy. Please pray too.
So you see today sucks, but I will get to go home to my sweet babies, to my piles of laundry, to the dog hair on the floor and be almost blissfully unaware of hurt and pain that can cripple a person for life. Tonight I get to go home and complain about making dinner. I GET to do these things. So instead I'll go home and hold my kids tighter, yell less, let them stay up later for more snuggles. Tonight I will make sure the hubs knows I love him. Tonight I'm lucky. Tonight my world hasn't been rocked, we never know what tomorrow will bring so I'm living for tonight, because Today Sucked.