So i've been doing a lot of post lately on how i'm overwhelmed and i need this and that's not right, etc.
Well it's me people... it's not that Chris works crazy hours (even though that is hard)... it's not that my dogs shed too much (even though they DO)... It's not that i need to loose weight (but that would be nice) it's me. I've been very open with my struggles with depression on here but there's a trickiness to depression... when you're slipping again you don't know you are... you think the world is wrong and you're not.
After reading some other blogs i've realized that my depression is back or never left, etc. It's easy to ignore it when I have the beautiful face of my daughter to look at and blame it on Chris, the dogs, the house, my job...
It's also easy to ignore it because when it's not beating down your door but quietly tapping you think it's just life... but when life doesn't go away and there's always a weight on your heart you know it's time to look for help. Luckily through my friends admissions i am able to reflect and admit to myself. I'm hoping there is something my doctor can do without me having to stop breastfeeding. Only certain medications are okay when you breastfeed and i think i would become more depressed if i had to stop now when things are going so great with it!
Some people think you're weak if you have depression but i think it takes a VERY strong person to admit they need more help then they can give themselves.